June 16th, 2014

This week went by so quickly; if it weren’t for my journal I would have forgotten most of it. I think that comes from doing very similar things everyday and being exhausted while doing it. This week I have had “sick brain” where I can feel myself getting sick and I forget things, run into things, its no good but the only way for me to get over it is sleep and I don’t have time to do that. My mind has forgotten how to turn itself off.  Yet so many miracles happened this week. Last week we had barely one progressing investigator and now we have almost five. For some reason the desire to actively change kicked in some more this week. I am so grateful to be an instrument in the Lord’s hands because I know for sure I couldn’t do the things I do without Him.

This week as I studied the Atonement I learned so much about Christ’s love for us. I am reading a book called “The Infinite Atonement” and I really am amazed and confused at the love Jesus has for me, and each of us. I feel just a small amount of the sadness He must feel for us, when we simply choose to not put Him and the gospel first in our life, when these people I have grown to love see the happiness and comfort they could have and then reject it. It makes me even more grateful for a loving heavenly Father and father on earth that teach me by example!

The weather here in Dubuque has been gorgeous! On Thursday the Zirkers took us to Eagle Point Park overlooking the lock and dam on the Mississippi. Everything is so green. People keep praying for rain to make things green again…. I’m not sure they know how much more other places need rain haha.

Today is transfer calls and I am guessing I am staying again. I guess I will see sometime today haha I have almost gotten to the point where I don’t care anymore to be nervous about transfers. I am going to be happy doing whatever the Lord wants me to do. Wherever He wants me to do it.

I love you all!

Sister Despain

Ty Zirker and I at Eagle point park

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